Have a Dark Day

Have a Dark Day❮Reading❯ ➻ Have a Dark Day ➳ Author Patrick Thomas – Heartforum.co.uk The very first collection of Dear Cthulhu columns as everyone's favorite monsters dishes advice and tried to help humanity in spite of itself proving that Cthulhu's advice can brighten even a dark day The very first collection of Dear Cthulhu columns as everyone's favorite monsters dishes advice and tried to help humanity in spite of itself proving that Cthulhu's advice can brighten even a dark day Dear CthulhuMy boyfriend Jim and I have been seeing each other for months Things have been going great Jim tells me he loves me and I know I care for Have a PDF or him a lot Our making out has always been hot and heavy Jim's a great kisser but lately Jim's been wanting to go beyond necking and petting I'm just not sure I'm ready to give him my virginity Jim says if I really love him I'll make love to him My mother always told me if a guy truly loved me he'll wait until I'm ready and not pressure me My friends all think he's really hot and I should do him I'm the only one of my girlfriends still a virgin although I have one gay guy friend who still is What should I do Confused Virgin in VermontDear ConfusedVirginity is a sacred beautiful thing and any man who would pressure you to destroy such a rare treasure is a cad you would be better off without As for your so called girlfriends they sound like a bunch of twits Remember it is better to be a leader of men than a follower The only one you should ever follow is of course Great Cthulhu Speaking of which some followers rather friends of mine are throwing a ritual sacrifice um I mean party shortly when the heavens align How would you like to be the guest of honor We would love to have you Email me at virginsdearcthulhucom And bring a dish to passDear CthulhuI've slept with my Teddy every night since I was a little boy even though my parents say I'm too old I'm in kindergarten now The other morning when I woke up Teddy was gone I looked everywhere but he disappeared I think the monster in my closet ate Teddy but Daddy says I'm wrong Can you help me Five in FreeportDear FiveYes Cthulhu can help you Your father is correct The monster in your closet did not eat Teddy It was the creature under your bed And he is hungry again.

wwwpatthomasnet.

Have a Dark Day Kindle ↠ Have a  PDF or
  • Paperback
  • 100 pages
  • Have a Dark Day
  • Patrick Thomas
  • 03 September 2014
  • 9781890096618

4 thoughts on “Have a Dark Day

  1. Michael says:

    A fun take on the Dear AbbeyAgony Aunt column except this time the poor hapless souls are writing to Cthulhu Some of the letters and responses are hysterical others miss the mark a little All in all an amusing way to spend an afternoon

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